Thursday, November 25, 2010


Is it really possible for a person to one day say "I could never live in Vancouver again. If I wanted to live in China or India, I would move there", and the next week go on about how the Legion in our little town is a horrible, racist organization that is designed to exclude First Nations?

It made me think - am I that inconsistent? I don't think so. I do try to be true to myself and my feelings. We all contradict ourselves, but I try very hard not to. Obviously, however, some people don't try not to contradict themselves or don't even know they are doing it. I think it is a case of them not knowing themselves at all, not caring who they offend (or maybe actually wanting to offend), and maybe not really caring what they say as long as it gets someone's attention. Does she even realize how contradictory she is? Does she just say what she thinks her audience wants to hear? What makes a person say two such completely opposing things? And what would it be like to be in her head?

I suppose sympathy is in order for this woman. From the very first, she rubbed me the wrong way ... and I can only imagine she does that to a lot of people. There's probably an insecure little girl under that facade. We all have that insecurity inside of us, but some people don't acknowledge it - and that must be awful. I just can't imagine being that defensive and offensive all at the same time. I wish I could hold a mirror up to her and say "do you really want to be like this?". But she will only see it in her own time - if she sees it at all. It's not my place to "enlighten" her. But maybe I can look at her and see parts of myself reflected. Everyone can teach us something, so I have to figure out what she is here to teach me. Must be something, because she certainly causes emotions in me.

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